My kid was diagnosed, when he was 18 months old. At that point of time, my kid was addicted to rhymes. He approached me for mobile/tablet only. Imagine a mother’s feeling in the particular scenario. It was very tough for me. After Gurugulam, he has changed a lot. Now he is completely a different kid.
How gurugulam is different?
# It helps overall family to connect with the child:
Once a kid gets diagnosed with ASD, the main focus is how to help the kid. so we start running behind various therapy centres .We start teaching the kids what is right, what is wrong, how to do it. We become therapist instead of being parents. We forget to spend good quality time with our child. We don’t let the kids be kids.
In gurugulam, their first and foremost focus is to help parents get emotionally attached with the child. My kid was very passive as he was so much addicted with daddy finger rhymes. So, he got into the loop of daddy finger rhymes. He used to play that game by himself by putting all the toys in his fingers. He was in his own world. Now, he has so much connection with me. He can understand all my emotions very well. When I am angry, he will come hug me , kiss me try to console me. What else is needed for a mom?
# Self regulation
Before , My kid didn’t have food regulation. When my kid was feeling hungry, he would cry his lungs out but he doesn’t eat the food which was kept in front of him. And , He used eat only certain foods like cerelac, mashed dhal rice and idly. Other than this he wouldn’t eat anything. It was very difficult for us to take him out as his food option was very limited. I always used to carry a bag with a bottle of water and cerelac.
Gurugulam helped us to understand why the kid has to understand his hunger. Now, my kid has changed upside down. He started eating by himself and trying new food. If he is hungry, he searches food in the fridge or keeps the pan on the stove and asks me to light the stove in order to prepare something for him. Understanding of the immediate environment has improved a lot. So does his connection too.
Not only food, overall regulation has to come for a kid.
# No instructions
In my personal experience I have seen lot of our kid who always expect instruction what to do. If the instruction is not given, they don’t know what to do. No ideation what to play and no intrinsic motivation from them at all. One example for why we shouldn’t instruct kids all the time, A kid who doesn’t move or do anything without instruction. Once he comes to school, he stands in the same place throughout the day if we didn’t ask him to sit.
Gurugulam helped us to understand how does instruction stop the kids initiation and make the kid robot.
# No reinforcement
Now-a-days we tend to give reinforcement for everything. For our kid , it becomes pattern. If our kid do small puzzle , we say wow good job(verbal reinforcement).But they kind of get used to it and expect the appreciation for each and everything. Imagine , our kid goes by bus. He asks for ticket from conductor. The conductor is not gonna say wow good job, you got the ticket. Where we are heading? In real life no one is going to please our child. We need to help the kid to cope up with the real world.
Gurugulam helped us to understand the results of reinforcement.
Gurugulam approach is totally different. Main focus of gurugulam is to make the kid connected with the pepole and environment, help them to understand the real world. Their approach is to help the whole family. It helps the family to live a happy life.
Home to Home is a program where kids visit all home of participating kids home without their parents. Like, breakfast at one kids home , lunch at another kids home , dinner and night stay at one kids home.
How does h2h program help our kid ?
- Helps to be Independent
Parents want our kids to be independent. Because of overparenting, we are not giving enough opportunity for kid to be independent. One example is self eating , we are not letting the child to eat by themselves. Self eating is the first step of regulation. It is very important for one’s survival. So kids has to understand the hunger and need of food.
In H2H program, we let the kids to experience the different types of food in different home without forcing.
- Pattern breaker
Our kids may have some fixation like sleeping in a particular room , in particular bed with particular bedsheet.
In H2H program, we sleep in different kids home each day in different place. It will help the kid to break the pattern.
For our kid changing from one task to another task is very difficult. In H2H program, we take kids to different home for different meals. It will help with transition.
For our kid social interaction is major problem. In H2H program, kids will get the opportunity to get along with other kids parents, grandparents and siblings. It is great opportunity to interact with so many people.
- Handling dynamics
For our kid, in Static situation, easy to process information but in dynamic situation very hard to process. In H2H program, with all kids and adults , kid cannot expect what will happen next .if they try to do something a kid will come inbetween . It will help the kid to handle dynamics better.
Flexibility is very much essential for all. It is very important to adapt the situation where we are. H2H program helps the kids to adapt the situation where to sleep , eat.
H2H is more or less like we go to our friend’s home for a night stay and have good time. In H2H kids eat, sleep and enjoy together. It is a great opportunity for the kid to understand different home structure, food and people.